I cherish intentional time with my family. Whether it’s a quiet weekend at home or a thoughtfully planned getaway, time together grounds me. It fills my cup and reminds me of what truly matters.
This year, I had the blessing of celebrating my wedding anniversary and Mother’s Day on the same weekend. I planned a relaxing beach weekend, especially after coming out of a very busy but productive season in my business. I had been looking forward to this getaway for months. It felt like the perfect way to recharge: sun, sea, and soul-deep connection.
But as the weekend drew closer, I began to feel unsettled. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Everything was in place. The weather looked great. My family was excited. So why the heaviness in my chest?
It wasn’t until I stepped onto the sand, feeling the breeze against my skin and hearing the steady rhythm of the waves, that I realized what was happening.
All the emotions I had tucked away after Hurricane Helene came flooding back like a rogue wave. That storm didn’t just destroy our home—it swept away years of family memories, stability, and a sense of safety. In its place came grief, uncertainty, and a lingering fear I hadn’t fully acknowledged until that moment. I believed those feelings were behind me. But there, at the edge of the ocean, the past met me again with full force.
Why am I sharing this?
Because that moment—raw, unexpected, and deeply human reminded me of something powerful: triggers don’t follow our calendars. They don’t politely wait for a convenient time. They rise when they’re ready. Sometimes in the middle of a business meeting. Sometimes while chatting with a new colleague. And sometimes, even in the middle of a joyful celebration.
As leaders, teammates, parents, and friends, we all carry something beneath the surface. Just like the ocean, we each have currents—some calm, others turbulent—that shape how we show up in the world.
Leadership, to me, means making space for that.
It means offering grace when someone seems distracted or short. It means practicing compassion when emotions catch us off guard. It means choosing empathy over judgment. And it means honoring our own stories while holding space for the stories of others.
But leadership also means showing up, even when it’s hard. It means modeling emotional resilience—not by pretending everything is fine, but by facing what’s real and choosing how we respond. It means taking care of ourselves so we can lead others more effectively.
And when we, as leaders, are willing to be vulnerable and acknowledge what’s hard, we give others permission to do the same. That’s how trust is built, not through perfection, but through presence.
That’s why I still chose to go to the beach.
On our way home, we took a detour and stopped to see our old house. The needle hasn’t moved; it’s still in limbo and that’s heart-wrenching. The rest of the drive was heavy-hearted, and I had to pull myself together because my kids were coming over. No parent wants their children to see them red-faced and emotionally unraveling.
It’s the same in the workplace. My office is about 100 feet from one of our main conference rooms. That’s how much time I sometimes have, to collect myself and choose how I want to lead.
Even though it stirred up difficult memories, I needed that time. I needed to reconnect with my husband, with the water, and yes, with myself.
Healing often begins in the places that first held our hurt.
The ocean continues to teach me that we can’t always control what comes our way. Water, like our feelings, can make its way into any space, at any time and without permission. No matter how “airtight” we think we are. But we can learn to respect it. We can learn to ride the waves instead of resisting them. And with support, love, and a bit of self-leadership, we can return to calm again.
So, if something unexpected surfaces at work, at home, or within—pause. Breathe. Reflect. Then move forward with compassion, for yourself and for those around you. There’s always more beneath the surface. And when we lead with that understanding, we lead with grace.
